Day off. . .

Amazing!  The world is still intact...even though here it is 3:45pm now and I have not raised one finger to do a lick of work so far today.  No pruning, no weeding, no mowing.  My yard cart is right where I left it yesterday full of barberry and forsythia branches.  Nothing has been accomplished inside, either.  Even more amazing is the fact that I actually stretched out in my hammock on a Wednesday afternoon to listen to an audio book and then took a nap!  I've never been in the habit of napping so I felt a little disoriented waking up from one.  My first instinct was to feel quite guilty as I thought of how differently I had intended to use this day but it didn't take long at all for the guilt to subside and for some self-indulgent permissiveness to take its place.         

I have been off the premises, though.  Earlier, I gave John a lift to town on my way to Curves.  Afterward, I sat at the little bluestone table in the library lawn to wait for him, sipping a cup of coffee and eating a bagel.  I took advantage of the time to familiarize myself more with my new phone by reading the manual.  I also had a nice impromptu visit with some of my family who noticed me there and stopped to say hello.  I enjoyed imagining how nice it will be when the new Village Square is ready for use like that.  Who knows, I might even take another day off and go take a nap there!

I could get used to this relaxation......

Digging for contentment. . .

Friday, 9:30 AM. . .

Well, so far I've played for Chapel, had a good Curves workout, then I came home and made a bacon/egg/cheese wrap to chow down while pondering some written excerpts by Rick Warren, Joyce Meyer and Father John Doe.  Now to get down to the business of choosing a target spot to work on in the yard.  Neither Rick, Joyce nor Father John were very helpful with that decision even though their words were otherwise spiritually nourishing.  Rick tells me that the best intentions are not enough; Joyce wants me to enjoy my life; Father John advises tolerance of circumstances both external and internal.  I think I'll scratch around in the mulch around the Hobbit Hole to freshen it up a bit and get rid of the weeds that are poking through.  Rick, that's the best intention I can come up with at the moment.  Joyce, I am certainly going to enjoy myself scritching and scratching in the dirt!  Father John, for the most part I'm okay with tolerating the external circumstances, however, the laws of charity you mention in regard to internal circumstances are (for me) a little more complex.  I find it difficult to recognize the nervous tension and sleeplessness you mention as avenues to contentment.  I'm not saying you're wrong, mind you...simply that I'm not "there yet."

But I'll give it some thought as I'm digging around the Hobbit Hole.       

One of "those" days. . .

This seems to have been one of "those" days so far and since it's now quarter after three in the afternoon, I'm not anticipating that it's going to change.  As I've been telling myself for the past several days like this one, tomorrow might bring the invigorating change I'm looking for.  Why can't I find it?  Why can't I make it happen, mind over matter -- just like that?!  I am tired and cranky.  (Whine...whine.  Pity Party!)  Good thing this is an "alone" day so others don't have to be subjected to me.  I'm glad it's Tuesday, the one day of the week when I can usually "hole up" and do whatever I want.  Ordinarily I have a list of projects I'm excited about tackling.  The list is there but the excitement -- not so much.  Oh, there sure is plenty that needs doing and I have to give myself credit for at least making the effort.  As I said before, however, it's one of "those" days. It seems like I have started many things but finished very little, resulting in my being surrounded by clutter that is neither clean nor where it belongs.

I had plans to work outside this morning but that idea was short lived due to the weather so I looked around to see what needed doing on the inside.  I saw plenty.  But where to start was the question.  I set the ironing board up to do some ironing but got distracted by stains on the bedroom carpet.  That was it, I'd clean the carpets!  So I picked up all the easily movable items from the floor and sprayed the stains to pre-treat them.  While waiting for the spray to soak in, I noticed the window drape in the living room was badly in need of cleaning so I moved some of the furniture away from the window so I could stand on the step stool to take the drape down.  I eyed the useless brackets in the window that used to hold blinds and toyed with the idea of removing them, too.  However, I dismissed that idea for the time being because I usually end up getting frustrated when I have to hold the power screw driver over my head to work with it.  Logically, that seemed like a job for another day...or better yet, for John.  Standing at the window gave me the idea that this would be a good day to get some of the windows washed.  That was something I've been wanting to do and it would feel great to have it accomplished. Getting down from the stool to get the window cleaner, I noticed two places on the floor where one of the cats had thrown up...just to brighten my day.  I threw the dusty window drape in a bag and got the carpet spray back out.  On my way through the kitchen, there were those rotting bananas I was going to use to make banana bread a few days ago!  Another day and I would have to throw them away.  But I wanted to take a shower.  However, it seemed like it would be more efficient to mix up the bread, then take a shower while it was baking.  After I peeled and mashed the bananas I began to assemble the other ingredients.  No sugar?!  I always have a spare bag!  I dug around in the pantry looking for what I finally had to admit wasn't there.  As long as I had so many things off the pantry shelves, I figured I may as well do some inventory and reorganize a little bit.  Leaving the mashed bananas waiting on the counter, I hauled everything off every shelf, poked around down in the basement in the storage room until I found exactly what I needed to assemble an additional shelf for even better organization.  I rearranged the whole pantry and by the time there was a place for everything and everything was in its place, I was starting to feel pretty good about this day...until I remembered the mashed bananas.  I was filthy.  You can't bake when you're filthy.  So I set the bananas in the refrigerator (where the latest army of ants couldn't get in them) and took a shower. 

The rest of the day has been likewise.  I did finish baking the banana bread (using what was in the sugar bowl and adding a little Splenda) and am enjoying the aroma throughout the house as it cools.  The carpets are not clean.  My bed is full of things I put there to clear the floor.  The ironing board, unused, is in the way.  The Windex is out but the windows haven't been touched.  But, by golly, I am showered, I have banana bread...and the pantry is organized!

Oh...did I mention that three of my left fingertips have blisters on them from when I tried to wipe droplets up from the hot plate part of the coffee pot?

I can hardly wait until tomorrow......    

Do unto others. . .

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you"  This is the Golden Rule we have all learned as we were growing up.  You may prefer, as I do, this version:  "In everything, do unto others what you would have them do to you" Matthew 7:12.  The meaning is the same regardless of the source.  I try to live by this rule and have found that for the most part, it's not all that difficult once you've experienced the benefits enough to realize that God wasn't/isn't/won't be kidding -- it really is how we're supposed to be with one another.  That said, let me confess a few of my (many) shortcomings that took place today.  The only thing that saved me from letting my impatience get the better of me was a sense of humor that allowed me to step "out of myself" and view the situation as an onlooker rather than a participant.     

Yesterday, I picked up a prescription for my grandson and was a little surprised when the pharmacist said rather assertively, "That'll be sixty-three dollars and nineteen cents," when I knew there was insurance involved.  I just thought, "Whoa...if it's that much with coverage, imagine what it must be without" and paid for it using my debit card.  It didn't occur to me to question the matter since the folks at a different pharmacy that I use always take the initiative in being helpful in these matters.  Today I found out that the entire amount was in fact covered by insurance and that I should go in and have the charge refunded to my debit card.  "Sounds good to me," I thought, so off I went.  When I got there I picked up two items I needed and proceeded to the back of the store to the pharmacy where I stood in line and read labels on things until all the side effect warnings started giving me anxiety.  I wondered when it would be my turn to step into the 'zone of privacy' beyond the magic sign that (I suppose) has powers to create an invisible wall that prevents others from seeing or hearing about any personal business or ailments.  (I guess I should probably let the store know that the sign wasn't working today since I couldn't help but hear everything, even with my hearing loss.  As far as seeing, that was easy to prevent -- I just didn't look.) 

Finally, I was next.  I offered to let a man go ahead of me, thinking my business might take longer than his but he was quite insistent that we go in order so I stepped up to plead my case, so to speak, only to be told that I needed to go over to another person's line because she takes care of billing.  So...I get in that line for a slightly shorter wait, carefully avoiding reading any posters or labels on things.  I noticed there was no 'zone of privacy' there.  I stand on my tiptoes to speak over the counter and again, plead my case.  "He takes care of that," she says, indicating the man I had just spoken with.  "He told me to come over here," I said.  "That's because he doesn't know everything is all set," she says.  By now the first line had grown longer.  "You mean I have to wait in that line again?" I ask.  She nods.  So...I get in that line for a slightly longer wait than I had the first time, examined all the magnifying sunglasses on the rack, counted all the brands of diet pills, spoke to a relative, listened to an entire phone conversation the woman behind me was having (about some kind of red rash, oozing with puss and is getting worse...) and had a brief conversation with a man who was leaving who had been two people behind me the first time.  "Are you in line again?" he asked.  "Yes," I said.  "I liked it so much the first time I decided to go around again."  For the third time, I approached the counter.  This time, a girl is at the register.  The man steps over and confides that, technically, this type of transaction should take place at the front register but "they won't know what you're talking about," he says. Then, Man One, Lady Two and Girl Three all confer.  Man One is cordial but clearly feeling slightly defiant.  So am I.  Girl Three is a little flustered.  I am not.  Lady Two is efficiently expediting the process.  I like her! 

Meanwhile, Girl Three: Do you have a Wellness Card?   Me: No. 

Girl Three: Was this a debit?  Me: Yes. 

Girl Three: What's your telephone number?  I tell her.

Girl: For some reason, it's not taking this number.  Do you have a different number?  Me: No.

She tries again.  No luck.  I give her my phone number from a long time ago, just in case.  No luck with that either.  So I ask her, "Are you talking about the phone number associated with my debit card?"  "No," she says, "the one for your Wellness Card."  "I don't have a Wellness Card," I tell her...again.  "That explains it!" we both agree.

The line behind me is growing......

She proceeds with further steps.  I swipe my card.  I "agree" to this and that by checking boxes and sign my name in the blue space in the little window, using the plastic "pen" with no point.  "For some reason I can't get this to go back on your card," she says..."do you mind if I give you cash?"  "That's fine!" I say before she put the "sh" on the word "cash."  "Would you like to have these receipts to show that we paid you the refund?" she wants to know.  "Yes, please!" I answered, distinctly.  Quickly, I asked, "Now, can I pay for these two items at this register......or do I have to go up front and wait in line again?"  She said I could pay for them there.  =^)  So I do pay (in cash), thank her kindly, gather up my stuff and turn toward the door.  When I'm halfway up an aisle, Man One calls out, "it helps if your insurance information is in order," putting me in mind of when my children were little and would defend their individual righteousness with, "You started it!"  I just shrugged and said, "It's not even mine."  His response was, "I know."  I suspect it was not so much that he was agreeing with me as it was his way to have the last word.

I hope I don't sound like I'm angry or harboring any ill will.  Quite the contrary, the humor in all this has lightened my load, you might say, and has resulted in this being a rejuvenating day.  I dearly love people with all their little quirks just as I hope they will love me with mine.