Obstacles. . .

Well, this morning I am not feeling as cozy and contented as yesterday and my plan for today has met with some obstacles.

We cannot avoid having obstacles in our lives.  To try to suspend time when we encounter them, as if they did not exist, while we wait for our journey to become smooth again is a waste of precious time and vital energy.  Obstacles are an unavoidable part of life so we may as well learn to walk right through the middle of them.  I remember when this concept revealed itself to me and the liberating feeling that came with it.  It was one of those sudden realizations that wash over you, seemingly unrelated to what is in your consciousness at the time. We may have thought we already believed it to its fullest extent but only after having experienced a connection (emotionally) do we understand that that belief (intellectually) was just the "tip of the iceberg."  For me, that connection is a spiritual one, directly related to my faith that God is always right on time, never early or late and His plans for me are good.  

Evidently, those plans do not include what I had in mind for this morning -- getting up at the crack of dawn, making coffee, then heading to Curves.  Instead, I am sick (a cold......the flu?) and have been nursing what must be frozen water pipes since dawn.  This water situation is a stark reminder of my inadequacies for handling situations that Bob would have anticipated and found a way to offset.  What I feel is not so much frustration with the tasks undone as it is the revisiting of the rawness of missing him.  There is also some guilt to deal with -- for my failure (so it seems to me)  to maintain the things he cared for so earnestly.   When faced with these particular kinds of obstacles, I am prone to lose my composure in a way that appears directly related to the situation at hand when it is really simply me, missing Bob.  More objectively, I realize if our roles had been reversed that he would have had similar experiences, except that the obstacles, themselves, would differ.   

So......here I sit......headache, runny nose, achy joints and all......thankful for the extra water in the refrigerator to make coffee.  The thermostat is turned up an extra notch, the faucets are in the ON position and an electric heater is adding extra warmth to the corner of the basement where the water pipes enter......while I listen patiently for the sweet sound of running water.

Am I content with this obstacle?  Absolutely not!  However, I will see it through with patience, resting in the assurance that it will pass, the water will run again, the sun will set and rise again and, in retrospect, the significance of this inconvenient morning will settle in with all the other "small stuff."